For the most part, I don’t need someone to tell me that I am doing a good job. I already know that I am because I do the best that I can. I don’t worry about not having people affirm me in the things that I do because I don’t do things for attention, I do them because I love what I do and the people I serve. This was not always the case.
I have begged, manipulated, and just flat out asked for attention since I was a little kid. I can remember my little heart calling out “look at me, look at me!” just as my children have said to me. There is nothing wrong with liking and needing affirmation. It is like an arm of love that wraps around us that lets us know “you did good, kid!” We all need that. While the world may not see and the people we come into contact with every day also may not give it. God, the Father, looks at all His kids and He sees and sends those “high fives” through His people, through His joy carriers. He will get it to us. Our job is to make sure we aren’t looking for some particular person or some particular way that we want it to come.
Expectation kills the gift every time!
This year I hit a milestone. I receive my ministry license to preach. When the credentials came in the mail, I was so stunned by the reality of the moment that I literally felt that it was unreal and like many others have done, I too looked for particular affirmation. I jested to get it. I shared it to get it. I got it but because I went looking for it, it didn’t really fill the need in me I was longing to fill. I was proud of myself for what I had accomplished. I cried when I received the thing I had worked for. After the hype in me subsided, after all the congratulations were through, after I had returned to my heart, and back to my life motto: fearless, faithful, forward! I had looked at myself condemningly and thought “oh, you silly, needy, girl.” That’s when God sent Sylvia, this sweet little lady, who is a joy carrier. He didn’t chide me. He didn’t ignore me. He simply waited until I was done. In a moment of total surprise and unexpectedness. Sylvia said “I brought you a little something. A congratulations gift.” I look down and in this pretty little bag are little-potted daisy’s. I simply smiled as my heart was completely filled with the warmness of love and joy. At that very moment, the sense that I had been trying to capture, exploded in my heart. I knew my Papa God saw me. See what Sylvia didn’t know and only God knows is that one of my most favorite flowers is the shasta daisy. I am not a flower person but one day a little pudgy boy hand picked me a shasta daisy and I was hooked. They grow in little groups of white here and there, little bits of joy sprinkled about in random patches. They remind me of all that I want to be, a random joy sprinkler just like Sylvia. Those moments do more for the hearts of people than anyone can know. It did for me. It fills in cracks of “does anyone care” and “does this even matter” in one beautiful glory packed moment. Affirmation matters! When we try to fill our own love bucket we actually crack a leak in it, so that, it never really satisfies. -Tweet This!
Proverbs 27:2 Let another praise you, and not your own mouth; a stranger, and not your own lips.
When we let God move in people to meet the need, the cup we are trying to fill overflows and runs all over. The whole and holy satisfaction that comes, there is nothing like it. It comes from the Father, the One who meets needs.
PRAYER: Father, forgive me for trying to fill my own love bucket. You want to lavish Your love on me and You want to bless the socks off me. In You, I am blessable. Help me not to grasp for affirmation or behave as if I am starved for attention. I am Your favorite kid! I accept Your love and gifts.
Have you been feeling like no one sees? Do you need a love bucket fill? Turn to the Father. He wants to fill the need you have. Look for His “high fives” today!
Thanks for Listening,