Make the connection


“We can’t win at somebody else’s expense. We can only fully be satisfied when the other person’s needs are fulfilled as well as our own.” – Marshall Rosenberg

He’s standing there looking at me and he keeps saying the same thing over and over in different ways …. ever been in a situation like that? I am just staring at him expressionless. My mind normally trips on “ Does he think I am stupid? Does he think I don’t get what he is saying? Why does he keep repeating himself like that?

But this time was different! This time I recognized myself in him. I realized that I do this exact same thing when someone just looks at me with that blank stare. In those moments I begin to fear the worst and I keep talking hoping to flip a magic switch that tells me that they get it, they hear me, they know what I am talking about?

Its called connection!

In that moment when he was talking to me, I saw myself! I realized that I do this too. I hold back what I am thinking and feeling. Not sure what to say. Don’t want to say the wrong thing.

…………and the pole came out of my own eye………….

I heard God say” He needs you to connect here. He thinks you think he is crazy!”  RISK IT!

I reach out to my husband and I wrapped my arms around him and I started praying out loud about what he was saying. I could feel him relaxing in my arms. When I finished he said “thank you” to me.


Some of us didn’t grow up knowing how to connect. No one taught us. I have mostly just tried to survive. I want to thrive. Jesus put His whole self on the line for people. Connected in the deepest and most meaningful ways. Compassion-Love-Understanding. I want to live like that.

When moments happen and I don’t know what to think I don’t want to push pause, to just stand there and stare at the person, expressionless and without connection. I want to live fearless. Faithfully loving them. Moving Forward. Connecting with their real needs.

Sometimes you just gotta get out of your head stop analyzing.



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