This year we went to my Sisters house. My Mom and my Sister and Grammy made all the food. It was a wonderful dinner. The pumpkin cheese cake my Mom made was wonderful…my sister’s pumkin pie was so good I had TWO peices even though I was STUFFED!!!
Before dinner my sister had us say what we were all thankful for…here was my thankful..MY KIDS…they are the ones that no matter what goes on in my life…I keep on trucking because they need a mom who functions…loves and cares for them.
SO before dinner …..I was an internal wreck….
I had somethings on my mind and I needed to find a decision spot….what to do? Do I do anything? what now? Well these questions had me a bit stuck in my head and I was having a hard time pulling myself out of the turtle shell of ….I – DONT -know- what – TO – do- about – THIS!!!??? I felt like I was walking around with a weight on my leg dragging me back to the same spot every time a quiet moment came…
I was feeling …. well …..alone.
I keep asking myself what am I thankful for….like maybe if I got to some practical basics I could get myself out of the funk I was wallowing in….NOPE..didnt work?
I was so stuck inside my head that when my Sister noticed….
she dragged me into a room and asked me what we wrong…we talked for a bit and then she said ” come upstairs and get in the kitchen and be with me!!” :0)
BE WITH ME!!!
She wanted me with her….
My whole perspective got a new thing to see and my focus began to changed.
Then my mom came in … she said something to me that I am going to hold on to for a while…I might write about it later but for now …for the purpose of this post. It gave me a…. what to do!!!
I NEEDED THEM…
Sometimes we (and by we I mean ME ) want to hide our sads and mads from our families and live in our ” everything is good” mode but for me “everything is good” looks like….. I AM NOT FINE!!!!!
So upon reflection…today I am finding my “THANKFUL” —
I am thankful that God sends what we need when we need it to help us in our inner messes…
He cares about all the littlest needs….that we may overlook….but when they are filled…we find we can travel along with HOPE again!!!