Ever learn something new or remember something about yourself and wonder “how did I not see that about myself?” Over the last year or so I have come to see some truths about myself.
Not that it is so terrible or anything….it is however different. I feel weird when I learn something about me and I didnt recognize it before as ME…
Well honestly I feel a bit disconnected from myself while in this transistion period of intergrating new information.
Like a new baby who learns that he can stand and walk….those legs are wobbly and they dont always work the way you think they should.
Some of these things I am remembering that they are peices of me that I had dropped off sometime in childhood during tramatic situation or moment of vulnerability. Somethings I just plain blocked from my self -view even though others could clearly see them. These things I Thought that they were not of use or accepted because my survival seemed to be balanced on not being like that, not having those qualities.
Being accepted, fitting in, having favor and people liking me became key for my identity. I am learning my feelings and those things do not define me. MY GOD DOES..I am a child of GOD precious to HIM. THANK YOU LORD!!
I guess I just needed to write about this blurrr of inner connection I have been feeling. Thankfully through it all ….I know those who love me. I know those who choose me and like me for who I am.
To those of you …THANK YOU!!!